Description from original post (created 2015-12-25 00:08):
Sooob... Why did I make something so horrifying??
Anyway, I came up with this idea after brainstorming what the heck would survive a nuclear strike (or really any kind of horrific event) and I was suddenly reminded of the supposedly undeafeatable Twinkie. And because radioactive waste can do strange things to nature, I thought why not bring those Twinkies to life?
The Twinkie Man. The terror of the nuclear winter. Created from five Twinkies and a box, this monster is not only intelligent, it's extremely dangerous. Though it may appear cute, don't be fooled! Its main objective is to kill, as it says on the box that binds it together. Its method of killing is brutal, choking it's prey without mercy. The Twinkie Man, when it happens upon a box of Twinkies, will assemble another of its kind using radioactive sludge to animate its creation, so there is no shortage of this barbaric creature. Because it has no circulation (and therefore no need for heat), the Twinkie Man is able to withstand almost any kind of weather. Its weakness is its soft and squishy body that doesn't regenerate when consumed, though you'd probably not want to eat it.
... Sometimes I can't help but question what I'm doing with my life. I'm just glad I didn't go with a cockroach. So, as an apology for this nightmare, have a couple Twinkies:
